My son has a new robot.

It may not even be a robot, I don’t know.  It’s not a doll…even a three-year old boy is offended by that.  I suppose that it’s an action figure…that’s the politically correct way to describe it to a little guy. To me, though, it looks like a robot.

I don’t think that this is a picture of the robot that my son has.  This robot may be offensive to him if he had a chance to see it.  It may be a villain robot. I don’t watch the Power Rangers with the intensity I’d need to remember something like that.

The thing about his new robot is that his new robot is actually becoming the sum of many parts.  Apparently, you buy the big robot first.  It is easy to put together…about 6 parts (the legs, arms, torso…head, helmet, etc)…not threatening to a parent at all.  It comes with a large sheet of instructions.  If I’d brought my “A-game” the day I assembled the big robot, I would have known that something was up.

“This is too easy” I thought.

My son studied that big sheet of instructions like he was preparing to take the SAT.  After a while, he came out of the bedroom and reeled off the names…in three year old English…of about 5 other little robots that he needed to complete his big robot.  These little robots (purchased separately, of course) attach to the body of the big robot.  I don’t know if the big robot will ever be complete.  It looks like there are hundreds of potential attachment points.

Last night, we were at Wal-Mart and bought another piece of the robot.  The robot looks pretty good to me already…my son loves playing with the robot right now…but there are other parts that we need.  I’m starting to wonder if it’s not like getting a brand new crack pipe…or a shiny new razor….for Christmas.  The big robot was just the conduit for a bunch of new little robots…there’s always going to be something else he needs to approach making it complete.

I think that there’s probably a limit to how big this robot can get.  At this point, he can carry it in his arms…take it to bed with him…put him in the car and go to town with him.  I suppose I could make a custom designed cart for the robot if need be somewhere down the line.

This toy is genius.  I don’t remember anything I’ve ever owned that caught me so unaware.  Who would have thought that a little plastic robot would have so many needs?  Who would have thought that an inanimate object could make so may silent demands?  Apparently, my little boy hears every one of them.