castles

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“If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them.”

Henry David Thoreau

So what happens if you slow down on your “castle building” because you just can’t remember how in the world people build proper foundations?

Or maybe you’re just scared?

Or maybe you think that you’re too much of a “realist”?

We’re re-doing a closet/storage area in our one bathroom.

When you have one bathroom for 5 people, it really needs to function as well as it possibly can.

My wife is putting together an Ikea concept…figuring out how to arrange the drawers and shelves and baskets in this upright shelving unit for maximum efficiency and aesthetic potential.

When I saw it, I said, “WELL…THAT’S GREAT… UNTIL SOMEBODY DECIDES TO CLIMB IT…” ( Our youngest is the only one who’d try something like that…but he’s very efficient at this point at making things exciting very quickly so it’s a “realistic” fear.)

Jenny was so mad at me…”You with all your positive thinking wannabe attitudes….why do you always do that?”.

I guess that I’m just scared a lot of the time.

That’s something to put on a résumé….”scared”.

Nobody tells the truth on a résumé .

It got me thinking…how do you bridge the gap between what you desperately want to be…brave and open to everything the world has to offer…and what you are…scared and “practical” and prone to rain on whatever parade you come upon?

How does that happen?

When you don’t start because you see the potential for a less than positive outcome somewhere down the road, what is to become of you?

What kind of mediocre life can you look forward to? What do look you look forward apprehensively to?

I am getting better.  Maybe they have a support group for recovering “realists”?

“Hello.  My name is Peter and it’s been 3,165 days since my last big dream. I’m a realist (i.e. pessimist).

“Hello, Peter!”

I’m not the kind of person who just wants to “drive it until the wheels fall off”.

I’m the one who wonders when was the last time the oil was changed.

But I do dream…snowshoeing into the blizzard, snow stinging my face, finally arriving at the cabin I’ve built…warming….eating…making sure everyone is safe.

Flip-flop, boardshorted…. down to the beach…wipe the sand off before I step back inside onto the tinted concrete floor, fresh fish on the hibachi…beach bikes out back next to the hammock trees.

The 66th day of a hundred day road trip….waking up with Jenny and the kids somewhere we’ve never been before.

Watching someone use a product I’ve invented that makes their life easier.

I dream.

I guess that maybe something I can work on is never trying to forecast what awkward thing might lay in wait for our projects on down the road.

What a killjoy I can be…even if I am just being “realistic”.

I have bridges to cross.

I have bridges to rebuild that I’ve screwed up the first time I went over them.

When someone’s built a castle, the least I can do is hold the ladder when they’re climbing.

And from the top of the ladder, if they listen really hard, they might hear me down at the bottom, holding tight to the lower rungs, quietly muttering….

“careful”.

 

 

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