Danged Facebook.

Dangitdangitdangitdangit.

Jenny asked me yesterday why I had so much music stuff on my Facebook page now.

“Why do you have so much music stuff on your Facebook page now?” she said.

I told her that I thought it was because I’d clicked on a bunch of stuff when they started asking me questions.

When someone asks me a question, I try to always be polite and answer it if I can, so when they asked if I liked Jimi Hendrix, it was kind of a no brainer to answer.

“Why, sure I do. Who doesn’t?” click. like.

How about The Band?

“Heck, yeah, I like The Band. The Band is a great band.” click. like.

Victor Wooten? click.like. Jesse Colin Young? click.like. Van Morrison? Phil Keaggy? Bruce Springsteen? Richard Thompson? clicklikeclicklikeclicklikeclicklike.

The list went on and on.  I finally had to stop clicking.  I was getting tired of clicking.

But now my Facebook page is full of news from Jethro Tull’s winter tour of the Philippines and pictures of Shelby Lynne eating breakfast.

I guess that’s cool…but the thing about it all is…I can’t keep up with my real friends on Facebook, much less my imaginary, “it would be kind of cool to hang out with…” friends.

So now I’m getting all this news that I don’t read.  I just don’t have the time to read all the Tull news.

I don’t have the time.

They did it with movies, too.

There was a list with all these movies…and when they asked if I’d seen any of them, I was able to click on a bunch of them.

Sure, I’ve seen them…I’ve watched a bunch of movies over the years.

There were movies that were popular…some old classic westerns…some movies that were kind of “arty”…lots of different movies.

Now, when I look at what I’ve done with all my clicking, it says “Peter Likes City Slickers”.

I guess that I liked City Slickers OK a bunch of years ago.  It was kind of cute.  It was cute…that’s all.

City Slickers didn’t really change my life.

It wasn’t a life changing event for me.

Not like Terminator 2…now that was an action packed movie, that one.

I don’t want to be remembered for liking City Slickers.

I don’t want that to be my main “critical legacy”.

I don’t know how to put the rabbit back into the hat.  I don’t know how to get Facebook to back off and quit spreading these rumors about me…(OK, half-truths…I did click “like” when the movie poster came up on the screen.)

Pointing the arrow and clicking the mouse are too easy.  I feel like I was set up.

In cyberspace, no one can hear you say, “NO…WAIT!! THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT!!!”

There’s no chance to convey subtle inflection.

There’s no “hipster irony”…there’s only what the words that lay on the page say.  What you see is what you get.

“Peter Likes City Slickers”.

Indeed.

I don’t know what to do about all of it.  I better get to clicking.

I hear that enough monkeys with enough typewriters can write a sonnet.

Who knows what I can accomplish if I type fast enough?