In My Head


If I’m running, and I haven’t for a while, not since I got busy and it was cold…and there was that morning that it was raining, and I wondered if I was too old….and then some joint somewhere on my body started to “twinge” a little….and my belly is getting bigger….I really should start running again…start in slow, maybe, and then build up a little each day until I’m really pumping out the mileage again…two, three, maybe even five miles at a time…but I don’t right now….run, that is….

maybe later.

Anyway…if I’m running, I think about running just like Frank Shorter.

I’m old school….what can I say?

Somebody good. I imagine…in my head….that I’m somebody really good and really fast…with a lot of endurance and dedication.

It’s an infrequent but fun game.

It’s like a kid imagining a great hitter….like Mark McGwire or Sammy Sosa….when he’s shooting up with the “juice” in the morning before going to Little League practice in the afternoon.

You’ve got to have real heroes.

Now, I don’t sing anymore.

Something broke in my throat…so it hurts to sing.

Nodules maybe….or maybe I tore a vocal cord or something…but something is different and I don’t sing.

In my head, though….in my head, I sound just like this guy….

“A Song For You” Donny Hathaway

Imagine a little Norwegian man singing like that!

I do.

Funny how that goes.

It’s not a matter of wanting to be something that I’m not….it’s just knowing that something good is worth enjoying….and maybe emulating…at least with the voice that I hear in my head.

(That last part is something that nobody should ever admit…or commit to paper….the “voice in my head” part. That is probably something you shouldn’t mention on a résumé….)

Anyway….Donny Hathaway….good grief, what a voice.

The guy was so good.

I’m going to sign the papers on the land loan this evening.

That’s something real.

And imagining that I’m Donald Trump isn’t going to make me feel any more confident or able.

I’m still a “little Norwegian man”….loose on the world with shallow pockets and a pen in his hand….and, thankfully, a chainsaw and a weedeater in the shed.

That place is a real rough “diamond in the rough”.

It takes a lot of time to get to the scary parts sometimes.

You’ve got to go through some heavy legal stuff before they leave you alone with the problems… and victories… you’ve made for yourself.

It’s all pretty exciting.

It’s a giant new project.

That’s a part of being an adult that might get easier with practice…the “going out on a limb” part.

I guess that if I did it a lot, I’d look back at the main trunk….and look down at the ground so far below….and think, “Piece of cake…I’ve been here before!”

Maybe it’s “time to go” when we really get used to any of the hard parts.

If that’s the case, I’ll take the scary parts for a while.

I can wait a little while to know it all.

About Peter Rorvig

I'm a non-practicing artist, a mailman, a husband, a father...not listed in order of importance. I believe that things can always get better....and that things are usually better than we think.

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